Brain Wash Makes Soap So Pure Like Rain (Draft 1)

Brain Wash Every Child

We know alienation, and
we will steal your youth, because
you are silly and plastic.

We Tell your youth it’s chic
and they fight for nonsense;

teenagers are nuts
and we can easily
make them crazy with chic courses.

Oh crazy elegant children
we love how you kill

because your professors and Imams
have gone mad, and

jihad is romantic.

Can we remind you that
you are ignoble, suicidal
and nuts;

No, you have become
mindless, and

Mothers now never
send your children to Harvard.

These kids are nuts
and they will kill many.

Remember there is a professor
who they believe mistakenly
told them to kill innocents, because
of past crimes of the US and of
imaginary things

So many great lectures , because
everything is relative. Not.

— Douglas Gilbert


What Used To Be In New York City (Draft 1)

What Used To be In New York City

The winter is darkly sad here:
the roads are closed for snow,
the subway is not running.

I can not go to Broadway
because the Plays are suspended

and the Long Island Railroad
is hiding.

I remember there used to be a snowball,

the play used to go on
and there was flaky suspension.

They can’t even scrape the rails:
used to be that a scrape
and a scab was nothing.

Everyone sang in the snow
hitched a ride on paradise.

I miss the day when
I got lost in the snow
and somebody’s dog
licked my face.

— Douglas Gilbert


Ooops. Who Wrote That (Draft 1)

Who Wrote That?

our weather computer model
is wrong again,

But anyway
we don’t care…

Destroy West Virginia
or any state with a coal mine
because there’s Global Warming.

Destroy the Keystone pipeline
because there’s a chic stone
like a Blarney Stone:

Hollywood experts
know best, and I remember how

Robert Young in “Father Knows Best”
became “Marcus Welby, M.D.”, and a
damn pompous arrogant creep in

one episode where he saw
an old friend of his in the hospital:

He said, “What are you
doing in the CHARITY WARD?”

Condescending creep:
I hated him for that.
He scolded his friend for what?

Hollywood: they scold
from ignorance.

Despite what they claim,
they have no compassion, unless
someone agrees with them.

we’re just actors:
we play the role
of a scientist
of a politician
of a human

Are they?

Dr. Roy Spencer
Blarney Stone

— Douglas Gilbert

Death To Coal And West Virginia

Death To Coal And West Virginia

by “Diane”

My dear husband
has not been to Harvard

but he is a noble man
and in the coal mine
he is much prettier than a canary.

I love him much more than
the President who’s been to Harvard
and hates coal with a passion;

we have worked in a hole
and his pompous self has not.

We know about energy and faith,
and he knows about subsidized solar panels
and about his crony friends who lose money
on impractical schemes– so smart that

he’d have a mechanical canary
like the emperor, but

the the song is paramount
when the variations
are still odd and ugly
and the original melody
remains the nightingale’s
original truth and glory

We can wash our hands, but
he can not.

— Douglas Gilbert

You And Your Damn Global Warming Theories

Go away with your damn Global Warming theories.
Go bother the Chinese with their Gung Ho use of coal.

Go complain to them if you believe this nonsense about
man-made Global Warming.

Go get them to stop their CO2 if
you really believe your nonsense.

Go complain to the Chinese.
Leave us alone with your nonsense.

Go destroy their economy
if you must, but

we have two feet of snow
to clean up.

If you want to be warm
go to hell.

Politics is not science.
The UN is a lie.

Tell Me

Tell Me

Just tell me
tell me the day is warm

and I will wrap my memory on the sun
and I will remember your warm embrace, but

just let me remember the day
when we were together, and
I could smell you like a flower
and we cried because touching
was so gentle and kind, kind of like

— Douglas Gilbert

Essay by Ali Khamenei, Guest Author : Nuclear talks between Iran and the 5+1 Powers (Prose)

Nuclear Talks in Geneva Failure

[ The Supreme Leader of Iran has requested space on this blog for a short essay on the condition that I do not post a cartoon of him. Since I’m not a cartoonist, I have agreed to that condition. However, note that the opinions expressed here are only the opinions of the guest author. ]

Guest Author Essay

Nuclear Talks
    by Ali Khamenei
 The Supreme Leader of Iran

There were seven hours of tête-à-tête between Foreign Minister Mohammad Javad Zarid and US Secretary of State John Kerry. Although Kerry brought a violinist who played “Hearts and Flowers” and also translated, there was just the bumping of heads.

There seem to have been complications in the nuclear talks in Geneva, the Arrogant Ones popping the bubble of faux optimism until by January 18th, the propaganda splash lay on the ground like a moribund water balloon. We made a little list of centrifuges, but the Great Satan’s head kept spinning, and John Kerry would not employ an exorcist to remove the sanctions, nor would his translator put down her violin.

We do not see that John Kerry is willing to hold out an olive branch. He still has secret meetings with the wild dogs of the Zionist entity and oppresses our dear friends of Hamas in Palestine.

Foreign Minister Zarif has said Iran holds out a Medlar branch: The Islamic Republic is prepared to accept any agreement that respects the Iranian people’s Allah-given rights to Uranium atoms for peace, prepared to accept any document that will allow us to develop nuclear technology for peaceful purposes. When our Islamic scientists will have given us nuclear missiles, we will never use them to strike a human being, but we must be able to defend ourselves against wild dogs.

John Kerry’s obstinacy is like Medlar fruit: it must be rotted away before we can use him. The Great Satan and all other infidels are to be used and not loved. Once bletted of their arrogance they can submit to the cooking of a treaty.

— Ali Khamenei