So Good To Die Young (Draft 1)

So Good
To Die Young

I had a Father who hated the world so much,
hated his Mother who had TB and left him
alone in an Orphanage where they diluted
the donated milk to make a profit, and
he grew up never knowing how to be a Father.

They stole so many souls declaring
themselves self-righteous, stealing.

He hated me so much because
he thought I was like a privileged outsider
that my Mother favored too much, like
the hated ones outside the Orphanage who
had all the advantages. So he destroyed
all his children with monstrous and continuous criticism.

And he succeeded
in making everyone fail. So when
he died at 72, we were very happy, and
very sad he would not let us love him.

— Douglas Gilbert

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8 thoughts on “So Good To Die Young (Draft 1)

  1. It’s very sad that he was so bitter about his own past that he didn’t allow himself to enjoy the rest of his life. Obviously he had many blessings after his childhood was over; you being one of them. I’m sure growing up in an orphanage was horrible but it’s also horrible to make your own children feel like outsiders. That must’ve been horrible for you and your family. I’m sorry…very sad indeed…
    I hope my son grows up okay, not bitter about not having a dad. I always hoped I’d meet someone who would love us and be there for us like a dad would but now he’s already 12. I hope he doesn’t hold that against me someday…that I was a failure in relationships.

    1. Oh I don’t know what’s worst: the wrong one or no one. But anyway I hope the love of one will overcome. But I have noticed that your Dad is very positive and a good male model. I think that will work. I think he will be a great kid, If he has your love as a backstop, I think he will be able to look out into the world for positive models. Oh, sorry, I don’t know anything, but I hope this makes some sense.

      1. Yeah, I hope the love of one will overcome too, it gets lonely a lot. We are lucky to have my Dad though, he is a really positive role model for him. It’s just different since he is a doting Grandpa and he only sees him on the weekend. I’ve been lucky that he is an easy kid to get along with and to raise by myself…I don’t have to get after him for much because he’s pretty well behaved.

      2. Hooray you, and hooray Grandpa… Such a lucky kid… I hope he can appreciate it, if not now (when kids are fickle and taciturn and rebellious sometimes) then later and forever. After a child learns to walk, what a thrill to watch him run.

    2. OOps. Sorry I meant “male role model”. But I wouldn’t be surprised if your Dad is a handsome guy but just not a professional “male model.” All of the terminology and euphemisms are hard to navigate. Nothing is obvious anymore.

      1. (hehe) I know what you meant…Nope, he’s not a professional model, but we do have good genes in our family, handsome fellas and pretty girls. I was lucky to get my Dad’s eye color (green with some brown flecks thrown in around the center).

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