Rhinoceros Under Us (Draft 1)


You can’t judge a rhinoceros by its horn,
or a book by its undercover, well

no, not always

Sometimes a rhinoceros is horny, but
sometimes it just talks in snorts:

poetry at the watering hole:

have you not seen floppy ears
and when it charges

it’s better than Pamploma
because it goes after tourist jeeps
and they are thrilled and mostly
not gored much, whereas

in Spain, traditionally
many are hurt by the Bulls
or on other days by the tomatoes, but

a rhinoceros would never
try to eat your pizza or a matador

though I’ve heard that at the watering hole
the snort poetry is magnificent

CD’s available soon.

— Douglas Gilbert


5 thoughts on “Rhinoceros Under Us (Draft 1)

  1. I love it! The watering hole and snort poetry made me giggle…makes me wanna pretend I’m a rhinoceros and make my own snort poetry…I love that you thought of the running of the bulls and compared it with the Rhino’s charge. Since both are horny – they booth snort too, now that I think about it. I’d rather be in a jeep though than on the streets with the bulls though but I bet Pamploma would be a wonderful city to visit some other time. I’ll take my pizza with no sauce…(hehe) don’t want anything to do with those tomatoes! Oh, I want one of those CDs…

    1. Thanks. Ooh, that was a close call. I was worried because I couldn’t remember if the tradition or festival of people throwing tomatoes at each other was a Spanish tradition or an Italian tradition. I’m glad all these things are Spanish because it makes it easier to refer to it. So, the only thing that I’ve heard about tomatoes is that at Italian Operas they throw tomatoes if they don’t like a performance. Holy cow, that’s nasty. It’s odd that countries in cultural decline cling to ancient triumphs, good or bad, moral or cruel. So there were Patrons of the “Arts” while at the same time there was horrible suffering by the poor, some of whom had hidden talents that were never revealed because they were barely surviving.

      1. Oh, well I’m not exactly sure if it’s a Spanish tradition or an Italian tradition. I assumed it was Spanish since you mentioned it in the poem. But i think I’d rather not have tomatoes thrown at me especially after performing for a crowd, no matter where I was. How humiliating, i’d probably cry! That is nasty and cruel. Yeah, i bet a lot of talents remained hidden because of money issues, you can’t pay the bills if you quit your day job to follow your dream.
        Maybe other times it was shyness or not wanting fruit and vegetables thrown at them if people didn’t like it…hehe

    2. Hmm, I wonder if there was ever a poor shy performer with money issues in those days who nevertheless managed to get up on stage and when the audience threw fruit and vegetables she picked up pieces and started eating it all and said, “Thank you, thank you. I was so hungry.” And she sits down on the stage and eats and eats….and then one of the soldiers in the Opera slaughters a pig and she has bacon and eggs…Oh no, that couldn’t be — not a soldier but a Prime Minister and so it’s actually bacon and eggs with mushrooms…

      1. Well I guess that would work out well then, especially if she were starving – I guess a full belly might help to ease the pain of being ridiculed.
        (giggling) I didn’t know that they let pigs into the Opera…i guess they just let anyone in who can afford a ticket.

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