I’m Really Tired (R6+)

I’m Really Tired (R6+)

I’m really tired of Nature —
there is no nature when I close my eyes

I drift into a quiet spiral
where there are no noisy
birds or circadas or fog horns
or horns of dilemmas or
hysterical noise of impending doom

The crickets, circadas, and birdys
are inarticulate, though charming, and
I have not time
for language courses
or ornithology expositions

I think the spirit has no leaves
nor bark

I’ve known about happy blind people
happy deaf people, so

It must be somehow that
happiness doesn’t depend on
flowers or music

But I have never known anyone

So what would I know
except loneliness
and silence.

— Douglas Gilbert

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2 thoughts on “I’m Really Tired (R6+)

  1. I think you know me…well, at least I hope you do by now. But I do know all about the loneliness, sometimes i feel lonely in a room full of people so it’s not really about physical bodies, and you’re completely right because ‘happiness doesn’t depend on flowers or music’ so it’s not something you have to be able to see or hear. I think it’s more about the intimate mental connections one makes with another.

    1. Yes, very good explanation or summary. Yes, connections, that is the mystery. It’s hard for me to be comfortable with something beyond language and ego-centric understanding because feeling is like a loss of self where the chatter fades and control is lost into observing one’s own reckless dream unfolding as if It were me with bells on.

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