On Being Done (Draft -2)

On Being Done (Draft -2)

I’m pretty much done
though still rare or raw

Too old
too poor
too ugly

not much to grill, and
it doesn’t seem like
I’m cooking at all

there isn’t anyone
who would listen to my
je ne sais quoi

yeah I know
I keep repeating myself —
I only know a few
silly phrases
and I suppose,
make-believe charm, but

really I think maybe
if I were given a magic wand
I’d use it responsibly
to seem human just for you

— Douglas Gilbert


4 thoughts on “On Being Done (Draft -2)

  1. My opinion: you’re not ugly at all. You’re beautiful and I would always listen to your je ne sais quoi – if i had a magic wand I’d wish you were here…

    1. You always make me feel better. I think that’s magic — I was going to launch into some kind of analysis but I think I’d rather be charmed… I’m not that familiar with feelings — I was never allowed to have them or at least told not to show them… so they leak out once in a while, but not always at the right time… but, caught between two worlds: among the stone-faced people a leak of emotion makes me “the crazy one” and among the intellectuals my analysis makes me “the stupid one”. I wouldn’t mind being in the crowd who listens and responds in a way that let’s me continue… Well,OK, so my last option is to try to finish a writing project… Yeah, I’ve said that before and ….

      1. You can share your feelings with me anytime you want…I don’t know why you shouldn’t show them. Well i guess i’ve hid my feelings sometimes too and then I overflow and seem like “the crazy one”. So I know what you mean there.
        Besides the gardening I’ve also been painting in my house. I just finished the kitchen wall this morning. I had to remove almost half the water from the fish tank just to move it (which was a chore in itself) just to finish that last wall…ugg, now i have paint and fish water on me (i’m sure I smell great). Time to take a long hot shower after I sweep and mop up from my mess…

    2. Brushing on paint and dressing in paint and fish water: sounds like a meditation in color and the scent of the sea, but I suppose the long hot shower is more soapy in the soothing melodrama of the skin of fantasy and caress.

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