I Want My Thousand Words (Draft 2a [second try at post])

I Want My Thousand Words (Draft 2)

Look up,
look it up.

She’s running wild
climbing adventurous trees

Maybe she’ll come down
for our favorite wine
and a dithyramb

I have seen her dither,
climb a tree in bloom
speak with flirty birds
and have a word with me
that is a subtle twitter bark
surrounding like a hug wood
a play with banter-word chirps

With such twiddle I wanted much
to touch her since then, and
there is a flourish in melody
that accompanies the twaddle
of the giddy blooming of me
I hear when I think of her as music

I know she’s reading
between tweets
sneaking a look at
longer things like me
world famous innuendo

Hello, I can see you and
I have words to sing.
Step away from the box screen
and meet me in the forest;
there’s a long body
of conversation
of pleasure

I want my thousand words,
don’t want to abbreviate you
or shorten the picture

I don’t see you
as a u or pic, and
I’m so sorry u
were picked on

I will file a brief
in the highest court for
je ne sais quoi appeals, and
run rampant on ramparts of verbosity
because at least prolixity has a tongue
a lingua frank and a lingua true
not politically corrected scrub
but where I could be a tree
and you could be a bush
in the metaphor field
away from the digital box
and on to lots

short enough for ya’
u,… Oh, I would ask
your real name, but
I forgot mine

— Douglas Gilbert

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2 thoughts on “I Want My Thousand Words (Draft 2a [second try at post])

  1. I love all the additions. “She’s running wild climbing adventurous trees” is good because it explains what she would need to come down from. I had assumed that was what you meant in the first poem because of the mention of trees but this new line makes it completely clear without the assumption. I like the change from “you” to “she” and “her”. Oh and I like all of your innuendo, it makes the metaphor field so much more exciting and enticing…

  2. ooops…I wasn’t finished with my reply. I posted too soon. All the excitement must’ve gotten to me (giggling). But i was going to say that I bet the forest is amazing in the spring. And that I thought the “tree” and “bush” was great. Nicely done…

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