Epic Poems : ” Ode To An Olive “, ” Alice In Wunderkinderland With a Hedgehog “ ODE TO AN OLIVE Apostolis missed Ferocious are the winds of fate Not so many years ago, Her babies were left Ferocious are the winds of fate, Rumors told Apostolis The babies grew, and Apostolis told them Odd weather is fate He had loved his olive trees No worry: there’d be His daughters were But they were desperate Ferocious are the winds of fate, He’d asked them to read Sophocles This time he didn’t know His family home seemed safe But his daughters grew Whirlwinds twist souls, This time he didn’t know She said, “Daddy Ferocious are the winds of fate, Apostolis missed Chloë wanted to build Ancient are the winds of fate, Freaky weather systems on the news: But Apostolis wasn’t worried – A clash of fronts approached, They said, once in 500 years Storms on his mind, Apostolis’s Clytemnestra called, Odd weather is fate Chloë called, When the epsilon is A peak of sun and Apostolis missed “Daddy, daddy,” yelled Clytemnestra, “Clytemnestra!” said Chloë Ancient are the winds of fate, Apostolis missed them and The girls ran to him, Apostolis struck him down The girls ran and screamed, “Fiend, fiend. That creature Clytemnestra sobbed Chloë said, Storm clouds gathered Theseus hid under a tree “Theseus,” said Clytemnestra Apostolis shot him dead “Daddy, daddy, daddy,” Who can one love Apostolis said, A tornado ripped the roof off the house Apostolis missed As the sun rose Ancient are the winds of fate, But like a feathered tornado There came a monster It said as confident as a banker, “Daddy, daddy, daddy,” Chloë said, Apostolis gasped, The jowl of the bull replied, Chloë shouted, “Take care of the girls, When the epsilon is Chloë shouted, The Monster cooly replied, Apostolis said, “Take me The monster grabbed Apostolis Ancient are the winds of fate, Chloë said, “You have gone mad and “Well,” said Chloë “Ha, you fool,” said Clytemnestra, “Oh hell, oh Drachma,” But they loved olives dearly. When smiley squirrels claw up the trees So Alice in her yellow Carroll dress Alice tired of Homer’s Odyssey “Oh dear,” she shouted to “Come, come,” he billowed Though chilled and falling down a cave interior But the doorknob had lips When Alice applied his advice Enter, the doorknob said land where stood the Caterpillar “Hookah booo-kah, indeed; whooo “ ’tis me, um, it is I, Alice “Indeed I see; delighted. “Unbirthday?” “Boo-kah, boo-kah, it’s not your birthday – “Um, no “Indeed, and there down the road “But,” he chortled, “it is you “Insurance?” “You must have insurance – “I… I… I’d wish upon a star for that “Yoooou indeed. We’ll lend you credits.” And so it was “Cry on these dear,” he said The signs Alice followed thus Alice felt so-so unsad, arriving there Maybe not unmad, “Pardon me,” Alice said, “Yes, speak up, speak down, don’t mess up “Yes, then,” said Alice, “Heavens no. A birthday cake course? “Well,” said Alice in a mental haze, “Silly girl. Pie are squared “Here here, not π, ” said the May Hare, The Potter spun. “Pots? Yes pots – “Oh on my harebrain, “Oh Hare, ’tis mayhem; look there The chef ran in with clanging pots. When he caught Alice’s eye Kaboom sprayed pie Yes indeed ’twas absurd Chef Steagill spake like a bellyache, “Oh dear, goodness gracious,” chimed Alice “Certainly not, dear girl.” And he began to sing, It was indeed a harebrained song But the Hare jumped up upon the table. “Very well,” said the chef, “I’ll bend: The Mad Potter spun around four times, Alice was puzzled, but “Only a possum,” he said, Alice was puzzled, but Alice was puzzled, but Just then, a little bird flew in for a drink, and “Very significant, this certificate,” “No,” said the chef, “OK, “Outrageous,” said Alice, “Hey! You don’t say,” Chef said. “Pardon me,” Alice said, Chairman Potter spun around suddenly: “Yes, then,” said Alice, “Um, seems a non sequitur “Heavens, if you love Croquet “Pardon me … um …” “Silly girl, you don’t try to talk “Appreciate such much but…” The May Hare hopped up onto the table “Pardon me,” Alice sang, “Shrews Thump thump. “They live in “Oh my…” And a swarm of flies flew Knowingly knowing something, “Aha,” said the May Hare, But Alice wondered Mad Potter: The hedgehogs rolled in Though chatter can matter sometimes But out of the noise Alice was embarrassed, Not too breezy, she thought But all kinds of shouts broke out: “No, no, no,” Alice said, Kindly the Hare jumped So Mad Potter joined in with a word: With that enabler, the Hare Alice just stared. But all the hedgehogs suddenly chanted, “Come out from under there, Hare, With a hop and a jump On the portfolio right, “Andalusia! Mallets fly in. Alice in yellow: Hare strummed Hedge clap Clap clap. With heels on their back toe Soon pink feathers descended Hedge a clap-clap Hedge claws on the table With castenets in their wings and with graceful beak to snout But when a flamingo stood firmly on its head To a hedgehog, Potter said, “Andalusia clap clap” They could have rolled Between the lines of engagement Potter concurred: This made Alice unsteady in voice, “Dear girl,” said the Hare, “Croquettes, ah yes, Alice,” “Indeed,” said Alice, “and “Yes, for your benefit: As Alice contemplated, the May Hare Play time, Alice thought Poor fellow being: “Oh, um, sorry,” Alice whined, “You don’t understand, Dear,” said Potter “Oh dear.” In unison: Potter professed: In unison proclamation with claps: Alice was floored by With the prance of a wild horse Potter shouted, “Duck!” “Yeow,” Alice screamed “Watch for the swing,” As it flew forward She reached up and grabbed it “Higher!” they shouted Like a flag ripped with care They stared at the sight While lifting her legs into breezy heights At the peak of the swing she heard Ut oh, good grief, some When she could A calming voice, but Astounding were the Inhaling the ground air Alice ran back through the grass She plopped in her seat, “Oh no,” they said. “Time “Oh yes, I meant Potter proclaimed, “I hear “OK,” said Alice, “um, “Gracious no, silly girl,” reacted Potter. As Alice was adjusting her gun As she suddenly turned, yikes “Thank you,” he said, “may I take “Um, oh yes,” Alice said to the waiter, “Very good,” he said Blissed hedgehogs everywhere The Hare hopped about and “Um, no, I’m fine.” “I heard you ordered the “Um, I suppose, and you?” “Edifying for you, “Um, an instrument? You mean “Hmm, never heard of that, “Well, I imagine a lot Potter intervened, “Yes, ’tis an art, This time the penguins were fast Alice was startled and befuddled: The Hare hopped about and Alice thought it best to enjoy As she massaged her tongue with there’s a frog that will pop out The hedgehogs ate their croquettes quietly Well, I suppose, she thought, Alice lifted one end of a cookie, and With the sound of the crack The Mad Potter said, Alice looked at the open end. “Certainly,” said the May Hare, “My future?” Alice puzzled, “Struggle and risk — that’s what Hare jumped in: “So tell us please Astounded, looking into it, Some hedgehogs yelled out, Alice shuffled the papers around Kindly the Hare jumped in “I’m unsteady with many.. “Alice dear,” said Potter, “dreams Hare added: “As the grasshopper hops, “I’ll make the most of this, Assuming some fun with life on a thread Well, Alice thought, at least The Hare wiggled its nose. “Well, good ouch,” said Alice, “It’s like Hare jumped: “Champagne!” said Potter, “Drink, drink, drink Potter: “Hop, hop, hop “Drink, drink, drink, and End: “Let’s drink!” Everybody drank a glass “Yes, speak up, speak down, “Yes, then,” said Alice, “Yes certainly, be at ease “Indeed, but which to whom?” “Well, you have pages, and see “Yes, um, so, I’m to make packages?” “Yes, silly girl, it’s color coded for risk “Uh, could I ask…” “Oh, yes, make no mistake The May Hare hopped “Oh Hare,” said Alice at last, “The Trojan War, dear. “But this is too weird,” said Alice. “That’s madness,” said the Mad Potter, “But in the scheme of things “No need for that… we spin the news “Goodness, girl,” said the Hare, “So tell me this,” said Alice, “Aha,” chortled Hare, “Who comes to consort with us? “Well, dear,” said Hare, “Can I have my cake “Of course. Chef Steagill At first there was just gleeful emotion – Onto the table for her with magnificent waddle “Make a wish for us all to survive, my dear,” “Well, I’d think to make Just then Archemedes “Hmm, well, that being said, Archemedes looked down “Oh, Archemedes “Oh my Alice you’re As millions rushed into The water rushed over — Douglas Gilbert
his dearly departed wife.
Only the olive grove was a comfort now.
Apostolis and his wife cried
for a young Mother they never met, and
wept that day in sorrow and joy, wished
she could have seen the olives grow
under an olive tree, abandoned
in the dawn that day when
the mother’s joy never rose
in the blackness of her shame
odd weather like a ferret at the door
who the father was. But
ne’er a word to confront him
though he saw that weasel
at a fair once.
walked in the shade, had
silly escapades, laughed at
pressing matters
under the olive trees.
babies come from
olive trees
like a weasel in politics
and the first pressings of optimists
politicians managing arguments
like ancient Sophists
cash-starved, and secretly
worried about drachma quakes
on some sneaky Friday night.
A cousin had the worry beads
and a drink of tsipouro for luck.
a midnight train to Athens
50,000 euros to play against doom,
pay for a pressing matter
extra virgin fans –
served the traditional
with local spice and flare
to leave him, the ancient one
and his columns of numbers
and of olive trees, because
they’d been to the Oracle
and were terrified by the words:
“When your father is slain
in the name of family, you
will find gold but not on Crete…”, so
they professed and protested
too much love for the old man
who wasn’t very old at all.
odd weather like a ferret at the door
but they were going on scholarship
to new worlds before
the Romans became afraid.
Chloë went to finance in New York,
Clytemnestra to new Athens.
who the hordes would be
the philosophers told him,
ha and he was the original alpha
rambunctious
wild parties, wild plans
plans fated in the wind
who the hordes would be, saw
follies and corruption
crushing austerity, but
Clytemnestra married the mayor
though he had had six previous wives.
don’t worry
politics is new, and
Theseus is a clever man
with business connections.”
odd weather like a ferret at the door
his dearly departed wife.
a luxury resort in the olive grove
for rich Europeans or Americans,
said, “Daddy, finance is modern.”
ferocious like a ferret at the door
hot fronts like the flush faces of
ECB bankers hearing “Drachma”,
cold fronts like frigid pale faces
drained of blood by Dracula who
might run wild through Brussels
had many Euros in his local bank,
but then again…
very rare thunderstorms
and an epsilon on the wall
for such weather conditions
and the olive grove looked fragile.
eyes rained on thoughts of his young daughter
the image of a young Mother he never met, and
he wept that day in sorrow and worry, wished
she could have seen the olives grow more
“Daddy, don’t worry
I’m coming home
with my husband Theseus.
I love him more than you’ll ever know
and he is such a clever man.”
like a weasel in politics
“Daddy, don’t worry:
I’m flying home
to set the finances”
on the wall, prophets say,
a ferocious loan is like a wolf:
it will eat all your sheep
the golden hair of his departed wife,
and he heard rare thunder while
he waited near a rare and
golden-tipped olive tree.
as she approached from afar with a man,
but she stopped in her tracks at a shrub.
stumbling out of a car. And
the sisters hugged from afar.
ferocious like a monster at the door
lifted his arms to the wind,
“Darlings of the olive grove,
run here before the storm!”
Clytemnestra with her husband.
with the thunder clap of his fist.
“Fiend, fiend. Monster!
I will get my gun.” And
he ran toward the house
as the rain poured down.
“What? What?”
is your Father.”
didn’t know which way to run
didn’t know who she was
who she knew
who she loved
“Oh God, oh God, oh God,”
though she was an atheist.
as if nothing mattered.
though it wasn’t much cover
and a foolish place in a thunder storm.
He didn’t know who he was
who he loved, who he should love
and he was afraid of hell, and bargains
he had made in a lust for power.
as a funnel cloud approached,
“do you love me more than…”
But she could not gasp a finish.
under an olive tree
as if nothing mattered.
the sisters said.
when one’s only Mother is dead
and she has never known one truly
“Oh my darlings of the olive grove
I truly love you as much as your Mother
and your Mother and every godly Mother
and every god of nature, and as much
as every leaf I have seen you play under.
Oh thunder, oh sorrow, oh tears,
I love my dears more than ever…”
and an olive press flew through the air.
his dearly departed wife.
Only the olive grove was a comfort now.
they rested under
a golden-tipped olive tree.
ferocious like a monster at the door
something flew out of a tree
with the body of an eagle
and the head of a bull.
“You’ve killed my patron Theseus.”
Clytemnestra said.
“This is impossible.
Let’s all run from
this mutant fowl, or
Daddy shoot it — it’ll
be good cooked
in olive oil.”
“What do you want?”
“I was promised a 7th maiden, and
it is my due.”
“Daddy, it’s delusion –
shoot it, shoot it, shoot it…”
your Mothers said to me
under the olive trees,”
Apostolis said to them.
on the wall, prophets say,
a ferocious loan is like a wolf:
it will eat all your sheep
“Daddy, it’s delusion –
shoot it, shoot it, shoot it…”
“So what is my compensation?”
and I will help you.”
by his shoulders with its talons
and said as if nothing mattered,
“Onward to Spain –
many Euros to go…”
and it flew away.
let the matadors prepare.
“Oh my God, if this
be delusion it must be fate.”
silly like a raving raven,
dark in sorrow, crowing
about lunacy and fate,”
said Clytemnestra. “You,
my sister, are no comfort
and my husband is dead.”
“it worked out pretty well –
the olive grove is gold…,
and shouldn’t we go
to the bank today?”
“you sophisticate in finance: the
banks are closed for the emergency,
for a month all accounts are frozen…”
said Chloë.
———————————————–
ALICE IN WUNDERKINDERLAND WITH A HEDGEHOG
and every cat meows for milky magpies
all the fields of Central Park are free,
and every school girl will unwind and read
spread her sheet on meadow grass, and
meadow larks chirped Volckermort, a
value-song for a feather-at-risk, but
duh-faulty Greek tragedy dark, a
theme so far from Central Park,
or even downtown Wall Street
the curious white rabbit who
pulled and straightened his suit and tie
“ ’tis most unsuitable to shout at me
when I’m to lunch with
THE Chef Steagill.”
by thoughts cold-Alice, she
ran off with her caution indeed
to follow him down a rabbit hole
she felt too big to manage when
the rabbit through a tiny door went
and devised a sinister tip:
“Drink the tea from mushroom lake
and you will shrink my dear
to a manageable size.”
she felt peculiar in drinking:
a discreet shudder cooing
for a door d’esprit looming,
every growing thing
then knowing tiny her
as it twisted itself ahead where
knowing her stands
Alice found Wunderkinderland,
who did smoke a hookah in
multi-armed charm
goes there? Speak!” he decreed
a refugee.”
It being your unbirthday
then you must be invited
to boogie at
the bank unholiday.”
is it now, nor would you be closing any banks?”
I don’t think so”
meet the Mad Potter and meet the May Hare
for the devil-may-care unholiday dare…”
whooo must buy the insurance…”
for endurance, for endurance
it is you, dear, whooo
must have insurance, and for
every leg and every segment I have
a million dollars for salve. So dear
write me a check for a billion dollars.”
but it’s quite bizarre
you’d think I’d have it.”
with a thousand hands
he wrote a thousand papers
“And the deal is done.
sign for a sign
sign on, sign on and
follow the sign, dear.”
were not only circuitous
but harebrained ludicrous:
“May Stop”, “May Go”, “Mayhem”,
“come See the May Hare”, “May Potter”
“Comme ci comme ça”
glad to see finally
madness in person
the Potter and Hare alone at
a one hundred seat banquet table
sang the un-fabled song:
“unsad unbirthday to you
unecstatic unbirthday to you
unsad unbirthday dear Alice
undramatic unbirthday to you.”
And after applause, the May Hare said,
“Now blow up the pie and
do not wish for anything.”
“I do appreciate such a
grand manic welcome
but please, if I may ask …”
the chatter to the ear, here here,”
pleaded insolent Mad Potter so
dizzily spinning on his chair-on-a-wheel,
“Yes do inhere the unsilent soul.”
“a pretty party — but don’t
I get a cake?”
One must have pie with explosives
to be unsilent of course.”
“I suppose day’s pie, but shouldn’t
pie be round with cherries?”
and have birds mixed with sugar glaze.”
“ahem aha, where is Chef Steagill
with his catching pots?”
lots of pots. May pots, mayhem.
May Hare, where?”
I don’t know where. Hey Potter,
send in the bloodhound and beagle.”
Chef Steagill.”
“I’m here here. There there all.
If everything is in disorder,
blow up the pie.”
she pushed the plunger
and the chef caught the bird
at least Alice had thought when
“I’ve got it now. For
today’s unholiday I’ll make
‘Peasant Under Glass.’ ”
with words like a dance, “Dear sir,
you mean ‘Pheasant Under Glass’? ”
“ ‘And when the pie was opened,
‘the peasants began to sing’
‘wasn’t that a dainty dish’
‘to set before the King.’ ”
so Alice applauded along
with the hare’s eerie squeal
a clap to the rhythm of the Potter’s wheel.
“Table this matter, Sir. For without Mr. Glass
it’s an impossible task.”
one hundred meals to be served –
then let it be then
croquettes by the dozen”
a greater lunatic than slick.
“I’m incredulous thus,
even with the thyme and time,
you ought to know, by the dozen
can only be ninety-six.”
the chef was un-non-plussed
“would say non possumus.
It’s un-impossible
for a man with certificates.”
with all the others, she was pulled
onto the grand table, and they
all held hands in a circle and danced:
“Certificates, certificates,” they sang,
“Everyone is certifiable.”
on the fourth turn, fourth beat
the chef retreated and bowed.
“Decorum,” he said,
“Everyone please be seated.”
the chef dipped its tail feathers in ink.
“This entitles the bearer to four
croquettes,” he wrote on a certificate.
said the Mad Hare, “and
dare you write the corporate bond
for United Flour?”
“better yet than croquettes
I have a bond for United Croquet
with mallet aforethought.”
“I don’t know about bonds
and all these phenomenon
but I love to watch croquet.”
“Pray tell. Enough said about endurance.
You certainly have the insurance…
You’ll see: while I prepare the meal
you’ll make a deal and
meet the mallets and the balls.”
“I do appreciate such
grand financial advice
and a chance to meet new people
but please, if I may ask…”
“Indeed, speak up, speak down, don’t mess up
the chatter to the ear, here here. Know
this, do adhere to the call of the unsilent soul.”
to meet the balls?
I’ve seen pretty balls, but
never heard them talk.”
and chocolate-covered grasshoppers
you’d know the rules: when a
hedgehog first signs up to be a ball,
he must make one sport speech, and
then he mustn’t talk at all or even
beckon with a mouthful of insects.”
with a mouthful of insects, do you?
It’s been a mild winter, with abundance
of creature and grape to over mull; it’s
always impolite to talk with your mouth full.”
and began a thumping tap dance to
accolades from Potter mad indeed.
“Sing,” Hare said, “Insectivora:
Shrews and hedgehogs and moles. You see?”
and hedgehogs and moles, I see.”
a credit-defaulty swamp
aha.”
into her mouth, so singing she stopped,
but certainly hummed, stunned
the others checked the forest sounds
for the woodpeckers peck
“It’s the running of the flies
and fly balls. You see?”
what was to come
“The hedgehogs are coming –
it’s the coming of the hedgehogs
to the banquet with all the
Zeitgeist and glory,
dressed to the nines
with their triumphant spines.”
like acrobats or tumble weeds,
and with a chatter-wonky prose
reposed on their seats, able
to feed with their noses on the table –
without doubt a clout indubitable;
forty-eight on the right had their portfolios
and on the left forty-eight undeniably without
in vehement unwonkyness, the
Hedgehogian debate seemed
roquét-cious but playful,
nine wickets contentious
like all the nine Muses, amusing with
usual silly debates: the course
is a zig-zag, yes of course!
Oh no, it’s a
double-diamond pattern
that must be enforced
a voice was heard:
“Young Lady, what do you say?”
feared another faux pas,
wanted to be a
casual profound
for some
combo-sensible aha’s
ought to find a tactful tack
sail into a cool wind, not into hot air.
“It’s like the Hawk and the Eagle,” she said
“one, sees a mouse running in zig-zag,
the other will pounce on a pattern… “
“Are you calling us a mouse?”
“It’s a metaphor for detail and pattern –
to tack for tact; for tactics and strategy…
um, un-…, um… can I unsay, please?”
to her defense: “Indeed
you may, and I will say
strat-tea-tactfully, everyone
must have jam.”
“ ’tis true:
everyone must jam or coin.”
ducked under the table,
rummaging up an under-lair.
“By the mallet, we must have music and dance.
Talent from the mallets
must fly in.”
if you’ve, so to speak,
gone to Spain,”
Potter dared.
the May Hare with guitar
stomped up on the table:
“Andalusia! Clap, clap,
clap, clap, clap.”
claws and toes
rapped on the table,
leftward a rhythm with a
clap a clap-clap
olé…”
clap-clap, clap clap
“Andalusia! Like I could be
a frenzied yellow meadow lark
I see pink clouds astounding me.”
with fingers across strings
feet and palm stomping
thump thump
“Andalusia! Oh mallets do land.”
a clap-clap
clap clap clap
and taps on their webbed feet
swooning flamingos flapped to the tune
landing in table center stage
thump a thump thump
paws clapping rhythmically
the flamingos flamencoed
hedgehogs and flamingos
danced about
Alice wondered what could have been said
“Complete, complete,
curl up, curl up,” as he
grabbed a mallet by its feet.
For the end, Potter’s hand talent
swung the feathered mallet
pink and feet tall, and
the hedgehog rolled
like a bowling ball.
on and on, if they could’ve
cajoled their way to have
a ball, to have more fun
but it would have to be done
when the Hare hopped and spoke:
“Attention! Clear the table
as best you’re able
or even not. Stop!
It must be done by tradition.”
there was a flutter of birds disturbed
and a bristling to orders, but
mostly a disorderly compliance
to all the interstitial conditions
“The waiters will be here
but they can’t wait for long –
have your orders ready,
but don’t be forlorn
in her thoughts and in her mood.
“Wait…,” Alice said, “wait, what
are our choices?”
“let the Mad Potter explain
since it is I who must go to
the under-lair retrieval and
arrange our ice water
and the Champagne.”
began a Potter hypostasis,
“an essence is dipped in a flour with flaxseed;
essentially you have an encrusted snack.
So don’t you be fatigued
from a choice of three.”
these are which three?”
croquettes with walnuts and assorted chopped insects
or peanuts and chopped peasants in lemon,
or if you find that
that’s a dilemma,
there’s a third to chose –
let it be lemon ice cream
and fortune cookies esteemed.”
came out from under
carrying on carts
all his paraphernalia:
hopping about with
buckets of ice water
and water guns.
“Fill your guns,” the Hare proclaimed.
and she squirted her
neighboring hedgehog
with ice water
he rolled up in a ball and cried,
“Argh. What are you doing?”
“I’m confused this day…
Aren’t we to play now?”
“The ice water is for the waiters.
“If you must play
get up on the table…”
Alice was embarrassed.
“Yes, yes, yes,
up on the table
if you are able, and
dance to excess…”
“Play requires extravagance
and the arrogance of fun
like a tamed water gun, it’s
the vanity of a solo dance
shooting steps across the floor.”
“Take the floor,
take the floor!”
all the imploring, but
stabled her doubts and
flew up like a flamingo.
and flight of bird fulfilled
she strutted and danced
and twirled her skirt until
as the gasps were heard
as a trapeze bar flew
just over her head
the May Hare said.
and then returned back,
the Hare yelled urgently
“Easy now Alice; catch:
“just seize the trapeze.”
and swung all the way back
like the clouds were no limit,
“No thrill should be diminished.”
her hair fluttered in the air
her trapeze in the air arced forward, and praying,
her hair exhorted all ethereal forces
to ease her beleaguering frights.
a voice from above, “Reach up
and let go.”
tricky maneuvers were needed –
which one, could be a tossup to heed
on the spur of the moment,
so still flying forward and up
she caught a foot and a leg
of a man falling on her
wrap around and climb him, she
finally looked up. A hoot:
it was Chef Steagill
on a golden parachute
she could hear his pounding heart
and smell his sweat; he
seemed cool
though he held his breath
swoosh sounds to touch down
as gracefully they floated
down to the ground.
and helping her up neatly, again
the Chef was cool like an orator,
“Now be off Dear Girl, for
the penguins are coming
to take your order, and
we must all be
seated in our chairs.”
wondering past a sign for Noah’s Lake,
but jumped over a hedge not stopping
for obstacles bushed or bred or snake.
near breathless but not:
“Um, thank you all for
that great treat. Yes, so
time to eat then?”
to order. There must be order.”
we will after
we order.”
foot fall so great of waddling feet.
the penguins will be
converging here to greet.
Bestir yourself folks, do!
Invoke your order urgently,
water guns ready too.”
then as you say, not for fun
the water guns are for the waiters.
Then, not to be flirty, we give
them the guns without fuss
and they squirt us?”
“Are you hot — do you have a fever?
Would you think a penguin is a provoker?
It is they who get very hot indeed.
Leave gun nozzle on spray, and
with a speedy soaking, just
be ready to allay their heat.”
a penguin snuck up on her
and startled her to jump
the gun went off
like a chiding cough, and
sprayed her returning waiter.
your order.”
“I’ll have lemon ice cream please, and
fortune cookies,” Alice remembered,
and sprayed him in allayment of heat
and waddled off.
sprayed ice water aloft, and
the penguins marched off
in refrigerated mist.
looked at Alice, “Is your
fever disciplined? Are you alright?
Would an aspirin be quite right?”
lemon ice cream, so in
the collusion of coolness
you’ll catch a bet on
the Croquet matches?”
I might buy your tickets:
trade you for a bond
or mortgage instrument.”
like a saxophone?”
never owned it. I wonder if
the interest rate would be erratic.”
of people are interested,
seems to me they’d
like to play exotic…”
keenly everyone must jam or coin;
at any rate, interests are emotive, but
wait, yes, I can hear the motors
of the foody go-carts –
the snacks are here
the penguins are back.
to slide trays of food around
like slippery ice bergs waddling,
everyone moving down with verve
making way for Alice’s vast servings.
In double-time wobbles the
penguins burned rubber, and
speeded away like old hot rodders.
twenty-four fortune cookies to judge
each more than a foot long, one
would say, for a cookie extreme
looked at Alice, “How’s your
fever? Have some lemon
ice cream.”
the lemon ice cream anointed, as she
gazed at all the cookies well appointed.
cool lemon flavor, Alice flung a
savored thought around in her head
about what her cookie fortunes would say –
hmm, perhaps a crystal ball instead inside
and I’ll have to tell my own fortune,
she thought. Perhaps, in one,
but do frogs tell fortunes? Maybe so.
didn’t seem to want to hear their fortune told,
but she was intrigued to know.
someone who eats all desserts
is bound to be curious
about the main things in life.
with a twist broke off a piece to eat.
It was pretty decent:
spinach and egg flavor,
a soupçon of shrimp
the Hare jumped up, and
the hedgehogs took note.
“Pull out the papers,
and have a look.”
“Goodness, there’s a stack of papers
as big as a book,” she said.
“those are your futures contracts –
of course there’d be stacks.”
on the edge of disappointment.
the future is for — potluck,” Potter said.
if next year you’re guaranteed
the right to buy wheat flour at
twenty cents a pound?”
Alice read fine print. “Hmm,
it’s a bit confusing, though
seems to say I’m meant to buy
on a future day at twenty cents”
“Bad price, bad price…
we’ll buy it and sacrifice –
must be simple grain not fragile flour.”
and many different futures she found:
“Wait. Many more nested contracts in here –
makes me hesitate and need to scream ‘oh dear
oh my’, hear hear; may I ask a question?”
with intercession: “Indeed
you may, and I will say
strat-tea-tactfully, everyone
must have jam. So yes?”
there’s grasshopper bellies
at ten cents a ton… but
forgive me if I don’t know tons…”
are made of risk and squishes, of
gibberish served cold — yet, all
can be seen in menageries of
animal-spirited chatter-nattery.”
we are in end times on suspenders
in shreded unspent climes dreaded;
times of crowing and growing
of loco weeds and locusts.”
I’ll try,” Alice guffawed, but
had to ponder the looming
abyss of lists and awe.
a chorus in unison sang like the Fates:
“Open another cookie, sweet bread of life
fortunes on futures can not wait.”
a taste of a cookie fate, would be
an adventure in eating and reading.
Picking up a cookie firmly at both ends
she cracked the specimen open near middle.
She pulled off the smaller piece just to mull over.
“Hmm, let me see how crunchy passions astir.”
“Ahh,” he said, “smells
like mixed mortgages and
stock index futures… or
is it stock futures from
the vineyards’ arts.”
an onion potato chip
shaped like a pouch.”
“Hmm, onion, dear Potter,
done and undone are
the layers of the onion –
deem one layer gone bad,
peel off another scheme. So
what wine goes with
potato chips and
lemon ice cream?”
“Everything goes with Champagne.
Everybody sing…”
the fortune is future
in however it spins.
We can build a bridge to over there
and then find out that we’re nowhere,
oh ah
Drink, drink, drink, and
leap o’er hedges and
say what you think!”
oh Hare, and bring us
our drinks so we won’t despair.
We can build a bridge to over there
and then find out that we’re nowhere,”
leap o’er hedges and then
you can say what you think!”
and Alice purred. She felt classy
pulling out the stack of papers
from the other half of the cookie.
“Well, then, it concurrs with
what you quipped ‘quid pro quo’
and also has many betting slips, abetting
the Hedgehogian Croquet matches.
Um, but could I ask… um…”
don’t mess up the most tizzy
to the ear, here, speak toast or cookie,”
encouraged hazy Mad Potter with wine
dizzily spinning on his chair-on-a-wheel,
“Yes do inhere the unsilent soul.”
“a pretty party — but don’t
I get a cake? Ooops, unsay I,
I think I said that already.
I have a question about perforations.”
it’s perfectly perforated.
All the contracts are perforated –
you tear off along the lines
and sell all the pieces.”
wrapping paper and ribbon too.
You can make a package. No?”
by the colors of the rainbow. Throw a
worthless mortgage slip in with a good one.
Slip a red slip with a blue and yellow one.
Leave a slip in from every cookie
and wrap a pretty package.”
you may have cake now,”
Mad Potter said with a bow.
with mayhem
“I’m roaming and lost like Odysseus.
Can’t I go home aghast ’cause thus
I wonder what everybody means
by ‘Beware of Greeks bearing gifts,’
so is it bleak or…”
But have no fear,” said the May Hare.
“There are no Trojan horses here.”
“Such chaos must be a dream,
I’m beginning to think
of streams of schemes…”
“If that were so you would do the chant:
‘deus ex machina’ ”
all the words here would seem
to require three goddesses,” said Alice
for you. No need to spin the thread of life.
So what would you propose so nice –
to call down Clotho? Would Lachesis
sell short or sell long?” grumbled Mad Potter
“If you called down Atropos,
how would you know
if it’d be the death of us
or the death of a dream?”
“What now is that thunder
in a distance of wonder?”
“A simple inquiry –
’tis activation of our
twenty lane highway.”
Shall it be less than consortium –
could it be Chefs
who bring shallots
with no sign of malice?”
“Not quite. Your Chef
will soon bring us the gigantic cake.”
and eat it too?”
brings it forth on private road,
then after, the millions will scream
and come like an omen. But first
the parade for our thirsts and
for all our Champagne dreams.”
an entourage of penguins waved from a float
and captivated woodland fans with a
ten foot high cake.
thirty birds placed the cake in exulted center.
lead the Hare jumping wily wildly.
a dream and reality compatible,”
faked Alice the fanciful,
who could only quake.”
popped out of the cake
fully naked and said,
“Drachma! Eureka!
Put Euro to bed.”
I thank you for
that sage advice, and
if I may say so
you’re very handsome in life.”
at certain endowments:
“Well, as I stand erect, please
do not reject this:
Everyone must retire
to Noah’s lake because
lakes and spas are endless
for the gods.”
if we could date,” said Alice.
“If not too late
I’d come onboard
your lonely ark to
be a two…”
like a daughter, much
too young for a disaster.”
Noah’s lake, of course
the overflow inundated.
the banquet table and
swans found their voice
to sing their swan song.
-
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dandegirl said
Excellent, Epic Poems! Both of them are perfect examples of what an epic poem is.
Doug said
Thanks very much. I’ll have to put them aside to read again when I’m in a better mood: when I glanced at them I thought, oh no what did I do, they’re so tedious and awkward, and what am I posting them for. In this mood I should probably leave them alone. I was going to tear them apart in some kind of revision which would probably make them worse. Oh geez they are not perfect….
But anyway, thanks for saving them with some positive feedback.
dandegirl said
I don’t think they’re tedious and awkward. The other day I read them with my coffee right after i first woke up. I didn’t comment til later because I was still so sleepy at first but they were a great way to start the day. In fact, almost every day lately I wake up and read something of yours. I’ve found it to be a nice creative starting point before I drag myself into everything else the day brings my way.